In my family, we are mean to our cats. But they love us anyway. I think. But then again they could be plotting away our eminent demise.

We tape strings to their tails. Trap them underneath laundry baskets. Put socks on their heads. Get them high on catnip. And cuddle them against their will.

In return, they puke on our floors and tear up the furniture. And eat and drink our food when our backs are turned.

Fair trade, I think.